Living Joke

What better way is there To express the feeling Than with the words, Agonizing, awful words, That infest one’s thoughts When the feeling arises? “Why am I never taken seriously?” “Why did I ever think I could do it?” “How could I have let this happen?” “This is why they don’t want me around.” “I’m such an idiot.” “I’m such a living joke.” No one particular incident causes this, No specific error consistently floods the brain With the inky blackness of despair, For even the simplest mistakes Send one plunging into the abyss. And all too often, it happens that The only solution one resolves upon Is to retire in bleak isolation With the dim, loosely founded hope That you will forget about it soon enough.