Light at the end of the tunnel
There's a famous quote that says, "there's light at the end of the tunnel." But how true is that?
I feel like the tunnel I'm in is long, dark, empty and endless. As I make my way through it, overcoming obstacles and challenges, I see a glimpse of light. I start to feel relieved and begin to make my way toward it. But as I get closer and closer, the bits of light start to disappear.
I stand there, hopeless and lost, as everything begins to shatter inside me. I don't know how long I can keep gluing pieces of myself back together.
In those little moments, I sometimes search for someone to lean on, because I can't carry this weight anymore. I think maybe, just maybe if I open my walls just a bit and allow someone in, I'd feel better.
It's foolish of me, how I try to search for love in someone when I can't even find it in myself.
I feel broken and just so confused. Why does it seem as though my heart no longer beats, whether for someone, or even myself?
I think, why not open up or talk to someone? Maybe I'd feel better. But as I open my mouth and try to speak, it's as though I've lost my voice. Words don't come out, just tears.
Once again, I lay there, helpless, not sure whether to stand up and try again or embrace the darkness and let it swallow me whole. Because, in the end, I always fall back to square one.
Even amidst the war in my head, I pray for better days to hopefully find the light. But who knows if I ever will?
So, there I am, in the cold, dark tunnel, alone, as I search for the light.......or maybe my end.
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