Lifes a Gas
Life’s A Gas
His wife ran away with his very best friend
His poor dog got rabies and went round the bend
So his wife and his dog and his best mate are gone
He’s starting to think his life shouldn’t go on
The thing is you see his best friend was his boss
So his job has now vanished to add to his loss
The mortgage unpaid and laundry unwashed
He rents a damp room for his life has been coshed
He went to the stove and he opened the door
He turned all the knobs and he knelt on the floor
His plan was to die but something then wrecked it
The hob was all gas but the oven electric
He choked back his sobs as he tried not to cry
For he was too useless even to die
He turned on the tv to check out the cricket
And there on the stand was his lottery ticket
He’s so blinking skint he don’t know why he’d done it
He’d never win.... then..... BLIMEY, HE’D WON IT
He checked the results and he checked them twice more
He’d never be lonely or skint any more
He had no champagne so he opened a beer
The last value lager he’d ever drink here
He’d no longer live in this dank, gloomy room
Then he lit up a cigarette.... big mistake.... BOOM!
Copyright © Terry Flood | Year Posted 2019
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