Let 'Er Rip

I went out with some guys for lunch we ate all we could find. We ate like we were starving and I must have lost my mind; I had a salad with bleu cheese and ordered extra fries, I ate a plate with extra beans, I must have had big eyes. The waiter asked if we would like some sweet things for dessert, I ordered up a slice of pie and spilled some on my shirt. We drove back to the office which is when I think it hit; my stomach started growling and was throwing quite a fit... I figured it would go away and ran to join a meet, I soon learned just how wrong I was when I sat in my seat... I loosened up my belt a bit to take the pressure off, and when my stomach growled too loud I hid it with a cough. The pressure kept on building as the meeting went on long, and that is when I realized that this could all go wrong. I stood and said "excuse me" 'cause by then I had to go, I tightened all my muscles then, and hoped it wouldn't show. I waddled to the conference door and quickly stepped outside, I knew I had mere seconds left to find a place to hide. With privacy just out of reach and pressure far too great, I had to let a little out before it was too late. I took a step to get relief, relaxed and let 'er rip, but then I couldn't help myself and felt the whole thing slip. The sound I made was deafening, it shook the office walls, but that was not the worst of it, as smell filled up the halls. I couldn't hold it in no more my body lost control, I had to make a break for it before it took it's toll. Perhaps too late I made a break and finally found a door, I pushed on through and found fresh air and let loose with some more. I found my car and got inside, and drove fast as I could, It wasn't long before I found I let more than I should. My day was done, my time was lost and so my dignity, the moral of this story should be more than plain to see: go out to lunch and take a break but don't eat the whole cart, 'cause you might find that if you do you may do more than fart. . . . Poem Info: 1. Written: 12.25.18 2. Written for the "Let 'Er Rip" poetry contest on PoetrySoup.com sponsored by John lawless.