Leaving On a Jet Plane

As I soared at forty-thousand feet strapped in the aluminum-tubed aerie,
Racing through my skull was a tune made famous by Peter, Paul and Mary!
They made leaving on a jet plane sound so very romantic and swell!
Contrary to their soothing ballad, mine was the flight from hell!

Ah, the thrill of going through the security check still lingers,
Recalling a most "touching" pat-down by Freddy Feely Fingers!
I had to remove my belt, shoes and the change from my pockets,
And open my carry-on bag to prove I had no guns or rockets!

I was "squoze" betwixt two guys leaning on my shoulders snoring!
One was built like Hulk Hogan - the other as fat as Herman Goring!
A squalling kid hollered for the entire trip!  I suffered beyond belief!
I ordered a Manhattan on the Rocks in hopes of finding blessed relief!

About the flight, I told Betty Boop the attendant, "I'm tired of this fuss!
Next time I travel I'll skip all this nonsense and ride a Greyhound bus!"

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) All Rights Reserved

NOTE:  I've suffered through many such flights wondering if the agony
           would ever end!

Entry for Debbie Guzzi's "Songs to Poetry" Contest
Copyright © | Year Posted 2013

Poem

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A  Avatar
October 13, 2013 at 9:29 PM
Bob, amazing win.........SKAT
Kendrick Avatar
October 11, 2013 at 4:26 PM
Congrats on your great win..Way to go..That is on a good flight..Sara
Johnson-Saunders Avatar
October 11, 2013 at 12:08 PM
Bob, congrats on your placement in the Songs to Poetry contest! Enjoyed reading your funny story. Sorry to day Greyhound was never any better for me! Love and blessings, Rhonda
A   Avatar
October 10, 2013 at 8:47 PM
Robert, , Awesome Songs to Poetry ... congrats~ LINDA
Adams Avatar
October 7, 2013 at 8:23 PM
love your humorous take on the song...I must admit it made me giggle....good write...congrats on your win!
Guzzi Avatar
October 7, 2013 at 7:41 PM
Humor as always and a great relief on a rainy day! Thanks so much for the entry Bob. Congrad's on your verse winning! Light & Love
Bauer Avatar
September 15, 2013 at 3:43 PM
hey bob! first of all, i'm glad to hear that you're okay in colorado. i have 2 brothers there (in lafayette and nederland) and both were affected, mainly by having roads closed, etc. it sounds awful! ~ now this poem is absolutely hilarious! you have nailed the whole flying experience in such a humorous way and i can really relate. it used to be fun to fly!
Dietrich Avatar
September 12, 2013 at 10:09 PM
hahaha, you captured the frustration of flying perfectly!!!
Lu Avatar
September 12, 2013 at 12:43 PM
Nice writing here.... enjoyed! Cindy
Kendrick Avatar
September 12, 2013 at 11:49 AM
I was delighted to read you poem while chuckling and even more delighted that you visited my page..Reads like a winner in the contest to me..Sara
Andresen Avatar
September 12, 2013 at 11:31 AM
- Always enjoyable to read your poems, Bob .... this is no exception :)))) - Luck in contest !!! - oxox // Anne-Lise :)
Mehta Avatar
September 12, 2013 at 4:51 AM
ah, very humourous one, I FEEL THE SAME WHEN I TRAVEL ONCE OR TWICE IN A YEAR, bOB
Tsiluma Avatar
September 12, 2013 at 12:29 AM
Ha, ha, that must have been a frightful experience - though very humorous the way you tell it. Very well penned!
Hill Avatar
September 11, 2013 at 6:38 PM
John Denver wrote that song you remember. good poem.
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