King Rickery Roo Rowdy Rollens Rugbuggy Royce

Peeking out from behind the bed was a wide banded raccoon king. I thought he was a regular raccoon, for I did not know of such a thing. He bared his broken yellow teeth and gave me a bit of a fright. You see I was in my pajamas, ready to turn in for the night. How am I getting him out of here? I asked a 911 operator on the phone. She thought it was hilarious and told me to write it up in a poem. But he is a wild animal, I told her. And he is scary and could be mean. He rolled his eyes to the ceiling, and I saw the left one was green. He’s got a green eye! I said to the operator; there was fear in my voice. My name is King Rickery Roo Rowdy Rollens Rugubuggy Royce. He said this with authority, and I felt he might be rather tame. He sat down and challenged me to a wild monopoly game. We became good friends, King Rickery Roo and I. He comes every once in a while when the tides are way high. He loves my bathroom and my yellow rubber ducky too. I do not ask, but I would guess he also uses my loo.