Just To Stay Alive

Drinking just to stay alive It makes no sense superficially If you'd dig deeper you'd see I'm already dead unofficially Endless therapy and medication "How does that make you feel" Talking and swallowing pills But the pain stays just as real Drinking just to stay alive It makes no sense superficially If you'd dig deeper you'd see I'm only kept alive artificially Pills, pills and more pills Nothing changes this desperation They say I'm not trying enough The neverending accusation Drinking just to stay alive It makes no sense superficially But if you'd dig deeper you'd see I was already dead initially Growing up sad and abused Seeing too much violence Hurt until pain became normal Beaten into submissive silence Drinking just to stay alive It makes no sense superficially But if you'd dig deeper you'd see Needing thick skin isn't beneficially Born just to be bleeding People only ever damaged me No money, no friends, no love Sad little disadvantaged me Drinking just to stay alive It makes sense if you'd be me If you'd dig deeper you'd see I was already dead initially I stand no chance Trauma too engrained From the day I was born I was already stained