Julius Has a Bad Day

Julius Has a Bad Day

By Elton Camp

Only last week, it was late on Saturday night
Young Julius was alone and hadn’t eaten a bite
He went to the ATM at the convenience store
Because he was short on cash and needed more

He decided a hundred dollars would be enough
Numbers entered and out came the needed stuff
Julius was a bank customer who knew what to do
The ATM gave five twenties, all crisp and new

He turned around and one on the counter laid
For a pack of chewing gum needed to be paid
The clerk took the bill and then nearly had a fit
“This bill is no good.  It obviously counterfeit.”

“But I just now got it out of that ATM over there.”
The clerk said, “Where it came from I don’t care.
We don’t accept any of that funny money in here
And that I can keep it, the law makes quite clear.”

Julius, his protest decided it was best to drop
When the clerk gave a break—not to call a cop
“Look, I meant every word I said to you before:
We don’t take fakes.  Don’t come here anymore.”

Julius quietly slipped on out of that store
He didn’t have his twenty dollars anymore
As he got into his car, he had a bad thought
If other bills were bad, what could be bought?

He decided for him to take the loss was unfair
Julius would spend the rest very far from there
The motor revved and up the road he did dart
And made a quick trip to the local Wal-Mart

It was when he paid that his problems did begin
The cashier made a stroke with a detection pen
“Security to register five,” she began to say
And loss prevention came there right away

“Look, I had no way to know it wasn’t good.
I’m an innocent victim.  It’s easily understood.”
Security admitted, “We have seen that before.
If true, then of fakes you won’t have any more.”

In Julius’ wallet, three more bad twenties found,
Cops had him handcuffed and lying on the ground
“It’ll go easier on you if you will decide to sing.
Give the names of the other members of your ring.”

Copyright © | Year Posted 2011



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