Je Disparais

I drive an appetite that never tires; A gaping heart engulfing all it seeks. I own a will that constantly misfires; A mind subverted by its own critiques. I navigate the valleys and the peaks Of life's complex terrain with clumsy cheer. Not prone to many extroverted streaks I am the man that likes to disappear. The common coquetry that love requires Imbues no flush of passion on my cheeks. I need a discharge from the jolted wires Of hunger, or a sparkle from mystique's. Cosmetic valentines are dull antiques Compared to appetence which has no peer. I know the damage disappointment wreaks; I am the man that likes to disappear. In solitude the social self expires, And something in that swathe of silence tweaks My maddened matrix with judicious pliers To harmonize the inner strife that shrieks. As loneliness begins its pangs and creaks Against the bars that keeps its cravings near, Denial is the only guard that speaks. I am the man that likes to disappear. Sporadically a rare disclosure sneaks Around this skilled, theatrical veneer. The man I am appears in tiny peeks; I am the man that likes to disappear.