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Jack

Filled with spite He hides from the light Ready to rip - Ready to tear Merciless, without a care Prowling the streets like a pro He knows just where to go To find his next victim Wait for the dark lined eyes to dim Shell of another thrown to the ditch Never enough to scratch the itch Burning inside his mind is a flame No amount of death will tame Cycle of death and pain On his hands the permanent stain Dripping red He will not stop until he is dead Filling the streets with blood and gore Until he becomes naught but lore

Copyright © | Year Posted 2012




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Date: 2/3/2012 7:26:00 AM
Hello Elizabeth, this is a good poem with vivid description and imagination. I love the connection ( i think to Jack the Ripper) My favourite line is shell of another victim. I hope you dont mind me saying and it is just my opinion. I think if you dropped a couple of the small connecter words.. ie line 2 the, it will intensify the mood, to me. Just a suggestion and i am not saying I'm right. Thank you Karen
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Deeks Avatar
Karen Deeks
Date: 2/3/2012 8:01:00 AM
hello Elizabeth and thanks for replying...Im glad you was ok with my comments. I know how hard habits can be to drop ... thanks and have a good day
Elizabeth Avatar
Kennedy Elizabeth
Date: 2/3/2012 7:31:00 AM
it is totally a reference to jack the ripper! thank you for catching that :) one of my creative writing teachers used to tell me the same thing about dropping connecter words, haha. it's just so hard for me to do, because i originally wrote short stories, so im not good at cutting words

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