It Is Not So Easy For Me

you think it's easy
maybe your heart
doesn't bruise as quickly
maybe your mind
is a bastion of confidence
thick skinned indifference
maybe it's easier for you
could be true

As for me? Well…
I like to stay clear
"once bitten"....20 times as shy
the reason why?
it's not so easy for me
this survival thing, you see
takes a lot of hard work
and my heart is replete
with burdens and cares
my gut wrenched poetic wares
only incite unfeeling stares
the reader unaware
apathetic animosity
guised in hilarity
isn't for me...

No, it's not as easy for me
to pretend I don't care
when my soul I bare
so I don't dare
let anyone come back round
who has  ground me into the ground
once before
well….not now
not anymore

it's not as easy for me
so just.....
just please….let it be.

Eileen Manassian
Copyright © | Year Posted 2018

Poem

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Situation Avatar
October 31, 2023 at 6:50 PM
Part of my poetry is pain. I can discribe with understanding. And those hurt can relate to what they read. it's a painful gift to aquire but at least I have it.
Callus Avatar
May 12, 2018 at 8:07 AM
Some people don't seem to realize how much pain a word can cause. Sometimes there is no need for words...it's simply the cold treatment of being completely ignored. Your poem shows that forgiveness and trust don't quite go hand in hand! Hugs // paul
Lamoureux Avatar
May 9, 2018 at 12:12 PM
I can relate, as a poet we make ourselves vulnerable. You have expressed this heartfully.
Manassian Avatar
May 9, 2018 at 12:28 PM
Some of us are more vulnerable than others, Richard. Some have think skins and feel that they can criticize freely or make intrusive comments. It isn't appreciated by me. Once I've been bruised...I have a hard time being vulnerable again.
Michael Avatar
May 8, 2018 at 7:36 PM
Sound very much in control...I like the flow and message...
Allison Avatar
May 8, 2018 at 5:33 PM
We all have our vulnerable side and some folk can't resist coming back and turning the screw in the hope we will weaken and crack - we've both been in this position but Eileen we must be strong and not give in to the morons who have nothing else to do than bully and belittle us. It's happened to me recently but I am not going to let them win:-) hugs jan xx
Manassian Avatar
May 8, 2018 at 6:35 PM
Oh!!! Even now? I'm sorry to know it, Jan. Some people don't realize that the damage they've cause doesn't just....go away. One needs to be protective of oneself...It's called self-preservation. Thanks for the visit, dear. You always have a friend in me. Hugs
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