Micheala Ruth September Poet Free verse

Is Grief the monster?

Does Grief hold onto me
Or do I cling to it?

Do I dig into 
The depths of its skin
Until this feeling sits
Like blood beneath my naills
Because it is the last thing
On this Earth
Left for me?

Do I lock myself 
Alone in the cage
With Grief
Because it may be
All I have left
To remember you by?

Do I fear
That releasing Grief 
Into the wild
Will mean letting go of you;
The goodbye I never got
Retreating before my eyes 
In exchange for its freedom?

Do I fear that 
Letting go of Grief
Is some indication
That there is no longer place
In my heart for you,
That I must give up room
For others?

Do I consume Grief
In all its grimy glory
In the hopes it will
Still bring me gifts of you
Against its better judgement
Or will?

I thought Grief was the monster
In the story of loss,
But is it really me
Hoping to find
Crumbs and remnants
And shattered little skeletons
Of what we used to be?

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