Jan Allison Poet Couplet

Notes About The Poem

 

Original title - THE BOTTOM OF THE BOTTLE - REALITY CHECK

Intoxicated

I’ve had a stark reality check
Lost my job, oh what the heck

Tears fall freely from my eye
As I survey bills piled mountain high

I’ve lived all my life at full throttle
Got gripped by a demon contained in a bottle

Alcohol has taken its toll on me
I’m a pitiful wreck for all to see

Folks find me lying in a gutter
Drunk again my neighbours utter

My wife has left me; I hang my head in shame
But I’m an alcoholic – I have no one else to blame

Lost my dignity, my family and I know the reason why
If I don’t give up the booze I’ve been told that I could die

I realise I need help to cure my addiction
Get back to normality, reduce my stress and friction

I’ve had a stark reality check
I need just one more drink… oh what the heck

FICTIONAL WRITE

2nd place in  Reality Check Contest judged on 05~20~15 
Submitted to Second Place contest sponsored by Laura Loo

title changed to Intoxicated for 'I'' Contest New or Old Poetry Contest

sponsored by Constance la France
05~19~16

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Constance La France September 15, 2021 at 5:31 AM Jan, very good, congratulations on your win in my "I" contest with this beautifully penned poem, well done ~ love and serenity _Constance

Christuraj Alex September 10, 2021 at 10:07 PM Wonderful fictional write, yet, full of facts about alcoholism. Beautiful Work. Congratulations!

Sandra Haight October 24, 2016 at 7:37 PM Such vivid imagery of such a sad addiction, Jan. You captured it well in this poem. Congratulations on your fine placement in this Premiere Contest. Hugs, Sandra

Beautiful Scars October 24, 2016 at 5:22 PM so sadly beautiful Jan..this touched home for me...congratulations on your placement and thank you for being in my contest :)-luloo Jan Allison October 24, 2016 at 6:15 PM Thanks LuLoo it is such a sad poem and addiction affects so many lives:-( hugs jan xx

Karam Misra May 21, 2016 at 1:38 AM Congratulations on your awesome poem and win, Jan. The last lines were just bang on. ~karam~ Jan Allison May 22, 2016 at 4:30 PM Thanks so much Karam:-) hugs Jan xx

Nayda Ivette Negron Flores May 20, 2016 at 2:06 PM Congratulations Jan on the placement of the contest Jan Allison May 22, 2016 at 4:31 PM Thanks so much for the inspiring contest Nayda-) hugs Jan xx

Deepak Chalise May 20, 2016 at 12:56 PM Interesting, enjoyed much. Jan Allison May 22, 2016 at 4:31 PM Thanks so much Deepak:-) hugs Jan xx

Demetrios Trifiatis May 20, 2016 at 5:39 AM ...Intoxicating writing dear, Jan! A seven without question! Jan Allison May 20, 2016 at 5:59 AM Thanks Demetrios:-) Have you grown a rose and named it after Vienna???? Hugs Jan xx

Joanna Daniel May 20, 2016 at 2:31 AM You've used the theme of alcohol addiction so well:) all the best:) Jan Allison May 20, 2016 at 5:25 AM Thanks Jo:-) hugs Jan xx

Alexis Y. May 20, 2016 at 1:36 AM Hi Jan, You have penned a well written piece. This is a reality for so many people. You captured the feeling of a "alcoholic" very well. Best of luck in the contest.Excellent job 7- Alexis Jan Allison May 20, 2016 at 1:45 AM Thanks so much Alexis and its great to see you back my friend:-) hugs Jan xx

Cecilia Macfarlane May 19, 2016 at 5:38 PM Excellent write and great subject for a reality check Jan. That first step is so hard for many, hats off to those who manage to beat this wicked addiction. Hugs Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 5:43 PM Thanks Cecilia - beating an addiction must be so so difficult:-( hugs jan xx

Harry Horsman May 19, 2016 at 5:06 PM Brilliant Jan, how true, you write it very well, Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 5:06 PM Thanks Harry:-) hugs Jan xx

Jean Murray May 19, 2016 at 3:59 PM Spot on! Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 4:13 PM Thanks Jean - I am sure there are people here who can sadly relate to my lines - thankfully for me it is fiction. Hugs jan xx :-)

Maurice Rigoler May 19, 2016 at 3:06 PM Said a drunk to a judge: Thank God I turned to drink. If not, who knows what I might have become. Like our limerick on Percy too. Thanks for the stop by. / M Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 3:09 PM LOL love that comment Maurice:-) hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith May 19, 2016 at 11:34 AM Hard hitting Jan. Most who are addicted know it but are too scared to walk away. Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 11:39 AM So true Tim - also I guess admitting to having a problem is the first step to dealing with it:-( hugs Jan xx

Sara Chansarkar May 19, 2016 at 10:21 AM Very well written Jan, thanks! Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 11:03 AM Thanks Sara:-) hugs Jan xx

John Hamilton May 19, 2016 at 8:35 AM Great poem on a vital subject that affects so many families, too often it ends up as you depicted. They do need help and support no doubt. Great job on shining light on difficult social problem. Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 10:08 AM Thanks John - I have friends who are living through this addiction and its absolute hell:-( hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso May 19, 2016 at 7:30 AM Very good poem, addiction is never easy. Jan Allison May 19, 2016 at 7:36 AM I agree with you Arthur - I thought addiction was a good theme for the 'reality' contest:-( hugs Jan xx