I'M Scared

Did I mention that I'm scared of heights? Well, I guess I probably just did See, that's the reason my step ladder Well, my wife, makes sure it's hid Now I can climb anything at all But my problem is coming back down Even if I'm standing on a step stool It feels like twenty feet from the ground Now, I'm also a little claustrophobic Okay, maybe, I am a lot I feel like the walls are closing in Even tho, I know that they're not I also have a touch of arachnophobia A fear of spiders, not ants Cause everytime I see one, I scream And it causes me to wet my pants Okay, stop laughing, that's not funny Cause I'm a little bit scared of humor See, I used to play practical jokes Til they told me it would cause a tumor You've heard, "There's nothing to fear but fear itself?" You guessed it, I'm scared of being scared Now, you better stop makin' fun of me Don't make me regeret that I shared You already know what scares me the most Yep, it's my mother-in-law The most hideous creature to walk the earth By far, the scariest of all Okay, I'm scared to end this poem What if I can't think of anything else to write? LOL, I know you know that I'm kidding Everyone knows me by now, tho, Right?