If I Were To Frenchify Myself

If I were to frenchify myself I would walk more often Maybe to work. It is only twenty-seven miles. But how would I get over the river? Would I want to walk on Interstate bridges? If I were to frenchify myself I would wear a jaunty red beret perched on my head at an angle while I paint. People would smile and say “I did not know she was French” and my Irish self would smirk. If I were to frenchify myself I would lose eighty pounds and eat vegetables and maybe a fruit. I would make love on the Rivera and speak all of my French words. French toast, French kissing, and FrenchFries.