I Wonder Why

Every day my thoughts are spinning Have I really lost or could I be winning Not a lot has come to a change Except life's adventure she can't arrange So she throws out stories she believes are true I go along telling her how great it was and something again we must do In front of her I won't shed a tear I'll only make sure she knows that I am here She eats very little but full her plate we kept There when she wakes and while she's slept Some day she has no idea who I may be I take care of her is all she can see People ask how I can drop my every day routine To those people all I say is " That is what Love really means" Put on your big boy pants and for awhile forget about fun Believe each moment you have could be the last one Her pain I just can not sooth and she hurts every time I help her more. She has been huge part of this life I am in She was there before it even would first begin Easier this wouldn't ever get She slowly dieing and all I can do is sit Tear in my eyes and falling apart No matter what she's got a big place in my heart I wonder if I will make this through While second guessing all that I do When she passes who should I blame Do I express myself or call it God's claim Some say I am doing nothing more then baby sitting But the work this all takes they just aren't getting For 3 days I've helped her as I cried I ask God, To Take her , how could you decide Believe this has Humbled me more then just a little bit This is the part of life I wasn't prepared to hit Mean , tough and heartless many times I have been Described That whole side of me is now filled with helping and pride As I sit back help, shed tears as to handle this all I try But God why pick me to show " How I Lie" On her last day who can really blame Or do I thank God,"For taking her and ending her pain ?" I do feel that I've done my part That doesn't make it easier for my broken heart There is something I really don't get Good people die while on this earth the rotten one's still sit! I know God does things in his very own way but I am beginning to wonder," Does he hear me when I pray! An Uncle Charlie Original An Uncle Charlie Original