Diana Morales Poet Free verse

I Tell Myself

Words calculate thoughts,
I tell myself.
Thoughts manipulate feelings,
I tell myself.
Feelings breed emotions,
I tell myself. 
Emotions links to the heart,
I tell myself 
but 
where does my heart go?
I tell myself 
why do I overthink?
I tell myself 
do I overthink?
I tell myself
why am I sad?
I tell myself
am I happy?
I continue to tell myself
over and over again,
but why do I keep
telling myself 
over and over again?

Every time we put ourselves last,
and we consider others first.
Life became the backburner
of this consuming cycle.
Sacrifice becomes meaningless,
because you are no longer living.
Sacrifice is not for the weak,
it's for the everlasting of those
who come after because
you surrender yourself.

I wonder if Jesus felt the same way?

I am not religious,
I am not honest,
I am not good,
I am not just,

I am just surviving the best way I can,
I tell myself.

How about you,
what do you tell yourself?

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