I Swore I Would Not

I have grown tired of violence over love. I threw my cautions aside when I felt this for you, and I swore I would not be a punished woman. You will not be the exception to this any longer. I cannot believe I thought I could find love in this pain, as if I deserved to sift through your eagerness to anger to find what love you could spare for me. I do not know when I will actualize the reality of where my heart is now, but I cannot pretend anymore that you did not break me. I do not know when you first said you did not love me, I don't know why I let you take it back. But I do not love you, because I cannot love you. Not when you don't love me.