I Should'Ve Learned French

I should've learned french before going to a restaurant. What I ordered there was food that I sure didn't want. I made the mistake of ordering cerveau and escargot. When I learned that it was brains and snails, I said that it had to go. When I refused to eat it, the chef threw me out a window and I got a shard of it in my ass. I went to a proctologist and he asked me five hundred bucks to remove that piece of glass. I refused to pay it and I got thrown through a window again. Now I have two shards of glass in my butt, I can never win. I can no longer sit down, I have to be suspended by a winch. If you decide to eat at that restaurant, you'd better learn french. (This is a fictional poem.)