I Refuse to Teach Macbeth When It's Forty Degrees Outside

King Duncan wouldn't allow it Chin sweat and air conditioning Sending me into a linguistic shaming spiral Flavoursome mints and sparkling water Won't fix this wet nightmare Telling the steps to SHUT UP Sock sniffer Chemical bomb leather shoes Armpits oceaning Give me Nigeria Or the jungle Where the birds don't sing My wife has been reading The Return of the Native for ten years But does owning an AK-47 count as knowledge? To the bat cave