I Met Myself and Turned Away, Refusing To Believe

i hit my brother’s dab pen and got high so i could play guitar better instead i saw jesus’s face in wood paneling like what a god might see before he dies, immortally of course if i didn’t have ADD i’d probably do outrageous like my homework or keeping a conversation or something and maybe i’d actually finally breathe so i could do stuff like everyone (else) just to lose my breath again but for now i’ll continue bowing down to worship my own personal god then turn around to pop more pills hoping he’ll go away i wake up every morning, quickly kill myself, brush my teeth, then go off to work and get in a car accident and lose my car and laugh rusty blood, the color of the dream i had maybe i’ll meet jimi hendrix in heaven and i could wear his headband maybe i’ll look down and notice myself waving in the mirror this time make sure there’s one in my coffin, thanks i forgot my pizza rolls in the microwave