I Like Things Regular and Complete

I suspect in my feckless youth my folks thought me rather slovenly, Obnoxious, averse to work and associated with dubious company, But Air Force sergeants dealt discipline with lingo at times unsweet, Convincing me that life is easier if things are regular and complete! They taught me to hang my clothes on hangers all facing the same way, With buttons buttoned and shoes shined which I observe to this very day. I prefer button-down collars; my pants must have a crease and pleat, Because you see, I insist on things being regular and complete! The Caddie DTS must be washed and waxed to a perfect sheen, And when dining out, woe to the chef who screws up my cuisine! My lawn must at all times be the best manicured on the street, Because you see, I insist on things being regular and complete! My barber must see that my eyebrows and hair are neatly trimmed. The barkeep must serve my beer ice cold with all the suds skimmed. I like folks who keep their word, show up on time and are discreet, Because you see, I insist on things being regular and complete! I detest cell phones and the 'magpies' who on them endlessly blather, Especially when driving or dining; they work me into a seething lather! I reckon some folks think me an old curmudgeon and rather off-beat, But dad gum it, I insist on things being regular and complete! Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (c) 2015 All Rights Reserved