Home » Poems » nastyolives blegh » i go to sleep and im still 16

i go to sleep and im still 16

rueful villanelles melt beautifully in the night
and everything i've ever wanted
woefully illuminates the lugubrious skyline ~

eyelids brushing against an elegiac stillness ,
momentarily forgetting a mother's absence --
aching viscerally in a daughter's lovesick soul ~

and father's half-witted love
whispers goldened gardenias 
of untold possibilities..

whilst i lay beneath forlorn angels
swooning a starlight-kissed course ~

reflecting a wistful silence filled with dusky desire --
as rubied rage devouring my malnourished being
resigns itself into moonless melancholy in a velvety twist... ~

oh, a dreamless love so viscously stripped !
a little girl trapped in the hour before dawn
left to wonder atrociously among prussian blue fields ..

unnoticed, overlooked, bluefully woe and stubbornly..
her submissive naivety retreating indigo reveries --
to be left with nothing but bittersweet afterglows
of what's left of a peony-dipped past ~

as a fathomless craving for a lovesick dream
fades into a gloaming angst of saudade starvation ,
cascading into starless fade
of hopelessness ~

absenceangerangstdaughterlongingfree verse

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