I Cry
I cry at baptisms, funerals, and touchy movies. There are more less-eventful venues that touch my heart and turn on the faucet.
I'm not one given to opening up to people about things personal, and if I should proceed with this openness with you, it too is unusual. I'm usually tite-lip with eyes wide open, sporting a heart shut and just barely cracked.
Nevertheless, there are times I sense a need to vent, to open up, to muse a bit about things personal; soliciting, not opinions, but simply ears and hearts open to things from the heart. Perhaps that time is now. Got a minute or two?
Sometimes, we feel the rhythm of our lives in a song. Sometimes, we can name that tune in a note or two. And sometimes, we feel our life is best expressed in a song.
First, let's be clear about one important thing. I can't sing. But yet I hear the sound of a theme song for a TV show that I watched as a child. "Head em up; move em out. Rawhide!" I also feel like singing the song, "I get around", followed by "On the road again". In a much larger sense, my mobility has been very measured, but in my own mind, I have been "A travelling man". So deep inside, I think I cry because I'm tired; tired of starting over; tired of rebuilding; and presently, stillness pleases me, and mobility wearies me.
I have yet to sigh openly about it, but deep inside, I cry. I cry because I have consented to do something that I do not want to do. I have navigated mine fields like this before, but was bailed out by circumstances beyond the control of anyone that was involved.
Would to God that I could be so fortunate this time around. Perhaps I am in too deep, too far along to turn back now without a heartbreak. I'm happy and content on Weatherby Way, writing poems and mini stories. What's could be better than entering a contest about what makes me cry?
With 18 moves behind me, I am resisting one more staring me in the face. My first move was my move away from home when I was 17. I thought the last move was my last when I was 62, but there's another move that has leaped into the cards. When we moved into this abode nine years ago, I thought it would be my launching pad to my heavenly mansion, but there might be a number 19 waiting in the wings. Yes, I have consented to moving, but I would much rather stay. If you're looking for honesty, presently, this is making me cry so deep inside. So, if you should hear me singing songs about mobility and moving; songs like, 'I'm A Travelling Man', 'I Get Around', and 'On the road again', or 'Rawhide', don't be surprised.
070921PSCtest, What Makes You Cry, Chantelle Anne Cooke
Copyright © Curtis Johnson | Year Posted 2021
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