Hope

The phone rings innocently. Who is at the other side? Could be no one then yet a peculiar feeling tells me it is the bearer of bad news. Still I answer hoping I am wrong. My mother is ill, trapped between two worlds; the worlds of fear and courage. My ears hear every word but my mind has created a sudden barrier that nothing seems to penetrate like some sort of steel web of unwanted denial. Fear floods my body like a torrent river flow, eroding strength and stability. How much longer can I bare it? Never it seems but hope still glimmers regardless of how dim. Miles are between us, I feel numb and unexpectedly lost. Where am I? It’s certainly not here in the presence of fallen angels. The bell of hope strikes a sharp note creating a gentle chime awaking my senses to the news, they are sharpened making the fear of loss suddenly commanding, corrupting my inner strength making it weak. I continue to listen all the while my body is screaming in protest. The voice stopped, I hung up, the pain and fear never lessened. Time went by all the while my mind was constantly in a state of anguish and grief. Endless stories were created, each one worse than the last. My family begun to shatter like a broken mirror, reflecting only the scars of misery and needless hurt. Hope still glimmered but appeared distant and out of reach. My mind grew tender, endless misery has eaten away at my last thoughts of happiness. The sting of fear created heartache for the bond between mother and child was nearly severed, severed by the hands of an unwanted deity. A deity of life itself.