Holiday Tears

'Tis Christmas time once again And much to my everlasting chagrin I cannot seem to stop the tears No matter the passing years. Christmas used to be such fun The kids up before the rising sun. Smiles, giggles, and what not To see what Santa had brought. Wrapping paper everywhere No one had a single care For it was Christmas Day Their one day to just play. I awake now with a groan As now I feel I am all alone. No visible happiness to share Nothing, but this utter despair. There is no imminent joy Neither tree nor even a toy As this day, yet again is here I clearly have no holiday cheer. At work I do smile But nothing worthwhile As you look into my eyes The smile is one of many lies. No one seems to care About my growing despair Or have I kept it hid so well That no one sees my secret hell? Whatever the case may be Pain will not let go of me. There are no happy cheers For me, there is just these holiday tears.