His Unforgivable Sin

HIS UNFORGIVABLE SIN “unforgivable” she said, when he broke his vows, then he arched his back. she was repelled by his act. a lover’s smile kissed his lips. “unbelievable” she spoke, as she grabbed an ax and approached the bed. two cockroaches leapt from sheets, rustling into the darkness. “unforgivable” she laughs, “you’re not welcome back” nudists race down road, their shame uncovered by dawn. they’re grateful to see the light. “unbelievable” she recounts to the jury “i’ll take my divorce and all of his assets too. i need to reset my eyes” ~ unsustainable ~ her marriage to this leacher. her bucket poured out, this saltwater fish thrown back. she’d waste no more tears on him. ~ unbelievable ~ heaven sent a faithful man stitched her broken heart. first, quilted kisses hurt, but his blanket of love protects. ~ unforgivable ~ a word not heard in her home. she trusts her husband. the sun shines on her children. God’s blessed her with forbearance. 9/16/2017 Broken Wings contest Form U - U Pick The Form - Poetry Contest Chosen Form: Tanka Chosen word: Unforgivable
Copyright © | Year Posted 2017

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Allison Avatar
September 24, 2017 at 4:24 PM
a very well composed string of tanka which build to give a great story! Congrats Kim:-) hugs jan xx
Rodrigues Avatar
September 24, 2017 at 6:11 PM
Thanks, Jan! hugs, Kim
Callus Avatar
September 24, 2017 at 9:32 AM
Both the layout and content of this poem merit praise, Kim. Glad to see the victim of deceit finding fresh love. Congratulations on your deserved win. Regards // paul
Rodrigues Avatar
September 24, 2017 at 11:07 AM
Thank you, Paul!
Sinha-Roy Avatar
September 24, 2017 at 12:50 AM
Congratulations, Kim for your win with a great flowing poem.
Rodrigues Avatar
September 24, 2017 at 11:07 AM
Thank you, Subimal!
Roper Avatar
September 23, 2017 at 11:47 AM
Well done, Kim, congratulations on your win! Hugs Eve
Rodrigues Avatar
September 23, 2017 at 1:22 PM
Thanks, Eve!
Pandit Avatar
September 23, 2017 at 10:53 AM
Congrats Kim!
Rodrigues Avatar
September 23, 2017 at 1:23 PM
Thanks, Vijay!
La France Avatar
September 23, 2017 at 9:07 AM
Kim, congratulations on your win in my contest, I love your series of Tanka's, well done!
Rodrigues Avatar
September 23, 2017 at 1:24 PM
Thanks so much, Constance!
Shaw Avatar
September 16, 2017 at 6:26 PM
Hi Kim, this is a powerful piece of writing. You certainly didn't take the easy option by writing in Tanka form. I love this piece of work, good luck in the contest, regards, Kevin.
Rodrigues Avatar
September 16, 2017 at 6:26 PM
Thanks so much, Kevin! :)
Pandit Avatar
September 16, 2017 at 6:12 PM
I like the way you have structured this poem-- very hard to do with the Tanka form--yet you managed it so well--this is a winning poem in my book--well done Kim!
Rodrigues Avatar
September 16, 2017 at 6:23 PM
Thanks, Vijay! I appreciate your comment!
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