Hell had no room

They turned me away from Hell's Gate
Said I was too much of a reprobate
Said earth deserved me, and I deserved it
Besides, demons were on strike, wouldn't fire the pit.

So I went back to earth, a few memories erased
Looked for money to steal, lives to waste
Set up shop with like minded hoods
Took what wasn't ours, got away with the goods.

Then the strike was over, so a demon made a sell
He said we have a spot for you, down in hell
But I replied, "the government steals more
At least I'm aware I'm corrupt to the core."

"Twisted souls parrot the latest dreck
"On the turn of a dime, good men shot in the neck
"Take the other guys first, then we'll talk about me."
The demon thought, then had to agree.

So I may look old, but I still steal
Hurting the little guy retains its appeal.
My friends are hoods, and thugs, and punks
But hell can be selective for the other skunks.

The demons never came back for me
Hell was overflowing, over-capacity
So many applicants, such a waiting line
Before they get to me, it will be a long time.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2025

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Greenhough Avatar
September 29, 2025 at 9:28 AM
Absolutely, this is hotly imaginative, harshly threatening, and has a hilarious good(?) outcome. I love it. Fav for me.
Oknin Avatar
September 30, 2025 at 5:44 AM
Thanks. Glad to make a 'fav'.
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