Gut Gripes
Gut Gripes
There is a man who eats hand grenades.
They go Kaboom! in his big fat belly.
You ask why does he eat them?
He's got a slight indigestion problem.
A trip to the doctors gave no joy.
As did anti acid tablets.
Changing his diet helped for a while.
But his stomach gripes returned twice as bad.
Then he remembered the box of grenades.
They belonged to his granddad.
He had nothing to lose.
So he pulled the pin and off popped off the spoon.
With a grin he swallowed the live grenade.
He stomach moaned before the bomb went boom.
It was like a whale being kicked in the balls.
His guts gave a mighty heave and he did a double back flip.
Then landed on floor and grinned before passing out.
When he came too he felt a little bit better.
For good measure he ate another grenade.
It was just like before but it cured his indigestion.
Now it's time for a curry and spicy kebab.
Then twenty pints of beer.
Just like the old days when anything went.
Eat what you want with no damn problems.
If his guts act up it's time for a grenade!
Copyright © Nick Armbrister Jimmy Boom Semtex | Year Posted 2015
Post Comments
Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.
Please
Login
to post a comment