Notes About The Poem

For Firebird's 'Free for all' Poetry Contest"

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Gotta Go, Gotta Go Right Now

I think no stimulus could be
as potent as the one to pee.
A feeling frequent and innate
is this - the urge to urinate.
It comes each day to everyone
at work, at play, or on the run.

It comes sometimes as home you drive,
and soon you're hoping to survive
the bursting of your inner dam
while sitting in a traffic jam.
Then down the street you drive distressed
with thighs together tightly pressed.
You wish so badly it would cease
and then you pray for sweet release.
And as you drive, you ache and ache
and curse that drink you had to take.
You want to speed, but big surprise -
a cop's behind you. Squeeze those thighs
to keep inside what wants to flow!
You do not dare to let it go.
Few impulses can so compare.
Oh, how you'd love a diaper there!

Then home at last, you do a dance.
You run while pulling down your pants.
And horror, if when once inside,
you find the bathroom occupied!
WEll, just be glad it's mountain dew
you're holding in, not number two!
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

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Crandall Avatar
March 8, 2026 at 2:16 PM
Hilarious - very well done! and I expect, universally relatable.
Godwin Avatar
September 4, 2025 at 6:27 PM
This is wonderful, I read it out loud, but Tim wasn't here, so Kyle and I laughed w/o him. I always wish I were a dude who could use can/cup/something in the care, and, of course, I've had the diaper idea, how great that would be. I've it so bad; I've contemplated pulling to the roadside, results of letting go in the car, etc. Love ... CayCay
Warlov Avatar
February 24, 2024 at 10:58 PM
Five more songs and I'll start working on the play ~ "My Urologist's Stolen Banana Collection" ~ " Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? " - Anon
Fowler Avatar
February 23, 2024 at 6:20 AM
Too funny Andrea. I laughed out loud. ;0. What a predicament! :)
Beaufort Avatar
February 19, 2024 at 5:11 PM
Andrea, guys have had similar experiences sad to say. Seems the older we get, the shorter time span between emergencies! Funny
Buhagiar Avatar
February 16, 2024 at 1:52 AM
Quite a fun poem. Lovely last line.
Peranteau Avatar
February 15, 2024 at 12:13 AM
this iz frigg'n fuuuuuhnee Andrea! I had to roll with it and it wuz worth it you poet you ;)
Situation Avatar
February 14, 2024 at 5:31 PM
New job, not reading much But this was well worth my time. Good enough to put on stage. I call it a 10 if it gets a grade for humor. And it relates to all of us as we all have experienced it.
Fisher Avatar
February 14, 2024 at 5:09 PM
What a title and completely familiar ride home; just today matter of fact. The last line's a great wrap up.
Hind Avatar
February 14, 2024 at 5:06 PM
HAHAHA. I laughed out loud with this one. You did great- you should win!
Rodrigues Avatar
February 14, 2024 at 3:02 PM
This is hilarious! We can all relate. Great job, Andrea,
Bauer Avatar
February 14, 2024 at 2:14 PM
this is absolutely hilarious, andrea! as someone who had to memorize joyce kilmer's "trees" in sixth grade, i really got a kick out of your parody (and your perfect rhyme!)...
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