Good News and Bad News

An old cowboy went in for his annual medical examination He was polite, plain spoken, sometimes he would growl Did not like doctor, hospitals, pretty nurses were alright He tried to be nice, was not looking for a confrontation All the doctors that knew him, expected something foul Most of the time they were right The doctor he had that day, was just the opposite Did not have time for nonsense and someone with an attitude Salty, with answers in sort of the same way "Doc, I came in here today to see if I am going to kick the bucket" The doctor grizzled, "Do you always have to be so crude" "Well now, it all depends on what you have to say" "No need in checking my vitals, I am still breathing" "Just sit down and shut up" "My old ticker is ticking, can't afford any cholesterol" "Well according to these chart, don't stop praying" "Done run out of Poly Grip, my old teeth are in a cup" "Now please , look at the eye chart on the wall" The old cowboy covered one eye, "Well By God, I can still see the Big E" "Well that is good, utterly amazing" "Kind of worried about my blood pressure, might be up a point or two" "You making all those funny faces, what do you see" "Getting kind of quiet, what are you calculating" "Are you fixing to tell me I am about through" Then the doctor said, "Well I have got good news and bad news" "The bad news is not all that bad, the good news is not all that great"" "But just wanted to make it all clear" "Some you win and some you lose" "But, I don't think that you will have to sit around and wait" "If you are still alive, come back and see me next year"