Golf Rules For Old Folks

I found a way of enjoying Golf,
when you're 80 plus years old!
It isn't rocket-science,
so listen and behold!

First of all, stop keeping  score,
it's important that you do!
Counting strokes, makes no sense,
for someone old as you!

The fact you even swing a club
and go from tee to green,
is really quite remarkable,
if you, know what I mean!

Not scoring, is so helpful,
the pressures disappear.
It opens up your options
and relieves your inner fear!

If your ball lands in a sand trap,
give yourself a pass.
Use your hand, pick up the ball
and throw it in the grass!

Mulligans are there to use,
but exercise control.
Hold them down as best you can,
no more than three a-hole!

Hitting over water
is unreasonable at best!
So use an older, beat-up ball,
if you decide to take the test!

Hazardous lies can happen!
But, I don't really care,
I just find a spot, to have a clear shot,
then move my ball right there!

Die-hards ain't gonna like these rules,
so here's instructions they can follow!
Pull their lips up over their heads,
and then they can simply swallow!
Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

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Tripp Avatar
December 2, 2017 at 9:23 PM
Lol. Love this poem. I agree wholeheartedly with you. To heck with rules. They are for ninnies.
DiMino Avatar
September 11, 2016 at 6:36 PM
Delightful! Great read. Thank you.
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