Gale Force Winds Expected

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 Gale force winds are expected; time to tie your knickers down
All heads bent, and everyone is pushing their way across town

Mouths are tightly shut, just in case their dentures out and fly
Ski goggles are on, just in case you get something in your eye

Skirts are all flying up with long hair that’s blowing out of place
Time you get into work your looking more than a total disgrace

Time is spent behind your desk rearranging all that went astray
Sat there hoping the wind has died by the end of the work day

Dinner; sat on the bench outside, eating someone else’s lunch 
As the wind sends their pickle onion right into your own mush

The bloke sat next to you is eating your fly away in my face hair
Reinforcing that old saying, how nice it is for everyone to share

And, no worries about putting your left over rubbish into the bin
The darn bits just fly out again once you have so neatly put it in

Then it is all back to the office heads down and pushing through
As we clogged up the elevator without as much as a say, or a do

Then it is back behind the desk, rearranging all that went a stray
And hoping the wind has died down by the end of the work day 

All signs are not looking good as the pigeons huddle on the ledge
Even worse when one drops off, because another in, does wedge

As 5 o’clock end of day arrives and no one is in a great rush to go
Stuck to their seats it’s almost as if the work force is on a go slow

One fresh air freak limbers up and starts heading for the exit door
Wow' one blast of hurricane winds and the guy was seen no more

The thought of settling down for the night was more than an idea
As we started to rearrange “We can do anything with bits of Ikea”

We gave the trouble of eating, to those brave delivery pizza boys
Though when we sent the orders in, the guys were a bit annoyed

It is not much fun delivering pizzas, on a light weight moped bike
One was lifted by the wind, once landed he was **** up in a dyke 

The pizza boy arrived, and said that's it the wind has took my bike
We piled all the pizza boxes up, the pizza boy bedded for the night  

Then the next day morning came, at last the wind had died down
Drama over we sent the pizza boy home with a tip of half a crown

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