Friendless

There are times when I feel like I’ve had enough; Don't the tough get going when the going gets rough? I'm stuck in the mud as the fog fills the air, This sadness engulfs me like a pit of despair. Sadness because I’ve been seeking a change, And yet all I am getting is more of the same, I keep switching directions and searching for more, Reaching up high, though I'm stuck to the floor. This sadness returns like each droplet of rain, I just cannot shake it, I’ve tried, but in vain. There are days I just want to shout out in retort, And yet its familiarity is such a comfort. It's like a warm hot tub on a freezing day, You ain't going nowhere but it's warm anyway, It's like a summer storm when you’re dressed for the sun, The rain is refreshing and the puddles are fun. But I don’t want the questions and I don’t want to talk, I just want to retreat, take a drive, have a walk. I know you’re concerned and that saddens me more, I don’t want to bring you down, yet it’s happened before. When I wanted a friend to make me laugh, or to try, I picked up my phone and then started to cry, For I didn’t know anyone that I could call, A person who could help me get past it all. I know there are people who care about me, In fact all my blessings are easy to see, And yet I find reasons to keep me confined - They’ve got their own stresses and they don’t need mine. Though all that I want is to get out of my head, And yet I get judgements, dismissal instead. Is it so hard to see the world through my eyes? I’m seeking a friend, a person who tries.