For Onion Pt 1

Since you wanna play riddles and poetry puzzles with me Before we go any further - allow me to bring you up to speed I just got cheated on - not even a month fresh After a terrifying, drug-infused, domestic violence, eight year conquest With someone I devoted from the beginning with 100% loyalty A narcissistic, skitso, egotistical soul - who believes he's Luciferian Royalty There's more where that came from - but that's the gist And I want what I'm about to write in this poem - to never inadvertently twist You and I - I've loved you since I was just an innocent child Through court systems, each other's relationships, tribulations, and trial Truth be told - I love you more than in our past But life decided to deal us both with sh!tty significant others of trash Allow me to be frank - please don't take offense to how blunt Let me be real to you like I always have - I don't gotta stunt You're in a relationship - and in his head so am I And it will eventually mess our entire years of friendship up - if we were to try I know you left tonight because I wouldn't simply put out And I'm sure there's more to that story - no doubt I've got way too much history with you - and I've definitely put in the work I'm way too good and valuable to be a side b!tch and hide and lurk If I'm ever to venture there - the more ideal it would be But you've gotten real close - then you'll push me away going back to being free I don't know the full extent of your feelings - or where in your life I am, truthfully I don't expect and will never ask you to cut it off with her for me However; I get the sensation more often than not - she won't let you breathe But when she does, you wanna have your cake and eat it, too And unless you want ALL OF ME - disregard this - you have nothing to prove But I'm far more of an upgrade compared to her - if I get a chance with you Never again will I ever be with someone if I suspect they have ill-intent I'll never dream of doing it to another - cuz I don't do well with religious repent I guess what I'm saying is I want you to know I refuse to believe anymore spoken words - Someone needs to finally show I don't want you at all just because of your body I don't just sit around and obsess with what we could do when we're naughty If you're good enough to f--k - then you're good enough for a legitimate chance I don't wanna mess up the 33 years we have - just cuz we chose to advance That's just a recipe for disaster that you and I will ultimately flunk Because we didn't listen to our intuition - when that thought we just thunk Our 33 years ain't worth the self-destruction if we fail - then each other we'll hate Losing your friendship to me ain't worth that future mistake As much as I want to and as much as I want you - let me get this off my chest I knew about the threesome - but I didn't know you wanted a "just me" test Yes; in my heart of hearts I know that you and I could work I just sucked at explaining it when you were here - and for that I know I'm a jerk Yes; I know in my heart of hearts that you could definitely get better than her Still you haven't ever given me a chance - or even to make your heart stir Please don't think this is a poem for my rejection Right now I'm not currently your first selection And if you ever became single and reached out to me to ever give me your heart Find comfort and solace knowing I loved you from our initial start I hope that you realize all the value, potential, and worth I see hiding within you We'll need transparency, faithfulness, loyalty and most of all truth You'll play a greater, more permanent role in my life (And, no, I don't mean like a wife) But to me, you're far more than just a good f--k You mean more to me than just a temporary suck Please search into the depths of your beating heart Because you're unique, original, real, and have the potential to be smart After 33 years you still can not see what I've discovered in you? You used to be full of vividly potent colors - now you're shrouded in blues When the time's right - I'd rather get a fair and more attentive chance with you I'd rather not f--k up our past and connection but sex with you isn't a suggestion Now tell me in response to your poem - do these words answer your questions?