Flat Pack Furniture
The damn thing's got too many holes,
I’m also missing several poles.
Instructions I simply cannot read.
This confounded thing's about to breed!
Pieces covering every inch of floor
I can no longer walk on as before,
and almost fifteen thousand bolts
I demand to know whose fault!
For gods sake this piece is upside down
so I stare at it with such a frown
because now I have to disassemble,
in hope, next time, it might resemble.
Five hours have gone and still the bits
stare back at me, I have a fit!
I swear and curse in a contortion
as this things all out of proportion!
You need six hands and several feet
or else this puzzle's has got you beat!
I fear that I might die before
these bits have gone from off my floor!
It says G6 to seven, then F2 to three
apparently using screws A, B and C,
from now on I'll just have to guess,
it's easier to beat Kasparov at chess!
Eventually I build this piece,
seemingly it’s for my niece!
My wife tells me it should be blue,
I reply ‘over to you!'
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