Fixed

I am hungry.
I take a bite from a sandwich.
I record its 343 calories.
She breathes, 
“Pathetic.”  
“You ought to be eating a salad.”
“You can’t afford to eat this way.”

I go to class.
I am too short to see over people’s heads.
I sit at the front.
She whispers,
“Fake.”
“Only the driven sit at the front.”
“Everything you are is a lie.”

I walk down the street.
My spine aches from hunching, so I straighten my back.
I am confident.
She growls,
“Ridiculous.” 
“No one is looking at you,
And nobody wants to.”

I stay home from practice.
I am exhausted.
I have homework to catch up on.
She snarls, 
“Lazy.”
“You have no motivation.”
“You obese cow.”

I open my mouth to speak.
I know something about the topic.
I have something to add to the conversation.
She spits,
“Stupid.”
“Your words are irrelevant.”
“You don’t deserve to be heard.”

I sit in church.
My soul is healed from the week’s destruction.
I reach for my Savior.
She rasps,
“Filthy.”
“You are the dirt beneath His feet.”
“You are too far gone to save.”

I sob in the dark.
My fingers hold a box-cutter blade.
I have failed again.
I choke,
“Worthless.”
“I am a failure and a disappointment.”
“She was right.”
Copyright © | Year Posted 2017

Poem

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