Five Lines Drip

Standing in the pouring rain, I felt like a drip,
The dark grey skies reflected my mood,
A salty tear rolled down my face onto my lip,
Tears and rain drops mixed, and I thought how rude
To be stood up by the woman I’d wooed!

* pure fiction

For Sara’s Five Lines metaphor & similie contest
Copyright © | Year Posted 2015

Poem

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Babcock Avatar
August 7, 2015 at 3:27 PM
Such a lovely write on this one. Nice flow but with a hint of sadness. What better wayt to cover the tears but with the rain. love phyl
Guillermo - Fraser Avatar
August 3, 2015 at 3:18 AM
jack, this lovely with the imagery and your flow but the scene is sad!Happy week!~Olive Eloisa
Horsman Avatar
July 9, 2015 at 3:51 PM
Congrats Jack, so glad I've read this..i find it ever so visual, I see a bus stop in there somewhere, being able to relate to it....Wonderful poem just love it....
Johnson Avatar
July 7, 2015 at 9:47 AM
Dear Jack, Thank you for remembering my birthday. I have been out of things with my broken arm and concussion so I haven't been entering contests or posting. Thanks for not forgetting me. I will have a nice birthday. My girls are coming to take me out. Love, Joyce
Thirtyseven Avatar
July 3, 2015 at 8:14 AM
Sounds as though she isn't a keeper. Just on the first line, I said something today that made me look stupid. Walking around in shorts and a short shirt I announced, "I'm feeling a little chilled today".
Dietrich Avatar
July 1, 2015 at 11:09 PM
soupmail, my friend. Did I tell you I can't do hotmail this week?
A  Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 10:54 PM
JACK Congrats, this is a sweet win. Love **SKAT**
Tate Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 4:23 PM
Jack, good job on the Five Lines Drip. Congrats.
Kendrick Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 3:19 PM
I am delighted that you entered my contest. All the entries were uniquely written and of good quality. I read your wonderful work and found it to be superb. Let me dry those crocodile tears.. Congrats on your win …Sara
Johnson Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 9:37 AM
It might be fiction, but certainly not unreal. :) Peace. Have a good week jack.
Dietrich Avatar
June 29, 2015 at 10:24 PM
ahhh,good to see the "drip" again!! Congrats. hey, Jack, I am able to do Soup but not Hotmail from my in-laws' house. Please if you are trying to write me, do it from here and not to hotmail! Hope you are liking your job. Luv, Andrea
Nunez Avatar
June 23, 2015 at 10:00 AM
The emotion jumped from the page to grab the reader! Such compelling 5 lines. Blessings for the contest, Jack. :-)
Roper Avatar
June 18, 2015 at 3:06 PM
I love your arrangements of words, even though it's pure fiction. 7 hugs eve
Onclaud Avatar
June 17, 2015 at 1:14 PM
drenched with fine images, jack.. keep it going, wow.. huggs
Pinet Avatar
June 17, 2015 at 11:02 AM
This poem presents a saddened viewpoint of a man experiencing a flood of emotions. Emile.
A   Avatar
June 17, 2015 at 10:03 AM
love the second line, good luck in the contest... luv p.d.
Hamilton Avatar
June 17, 2015 at 1:16 AM
excellent Jack I can see you standing there drenched gl luck in contest hugs 7
Muideen Avatar
June 17, 2015 at 12:58 AM
Great penned dear poet, I love your write.........A.M.
Dietrich Avatar
June 16, 2015 at 4:49 PM
yes, a great similie, drip!!! I like this, Jack. good luck in her contest.
Maverick Avatar
June 16, 2015 at 3:57 PM
Well wrote Jack, Its all part of learning I suppose, and maybe you were cut out for better things.?
Callus Avatar
June 16, 2015 at 1:25 PM
Top marks for the content and rhyme, Jack! Somehow this reminds me of my poem "Scorned". We are both left with broken hearts!:) All the best, my friend. // paul
La France Avatar
June 16, 2015 at 11:43 AM
Jack, so nice to see you on the soup today and you have penned a beautiful poem for the contest, 7 and thanks for visiting my poem, decay
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