Fit To Be Tied

I'm Restless and defeated Feeling overwhelmed and cheated My Plate about to topple Don't you dare pop that waffle Shut your mouth and the door Clean the dog pee off the floor Fit to be tied, mouth foaming Computer died, phone roaming Don't look at me with that cheesy grin My patience, like ice, that's growing thin Just finished my Alaskan shower Thanks to you bathing for an hour Spent my last dollar topping off my tank Just to find, my car won't crank Pants ripped when I bent over Picking up a 3 leafed clover Dog ran off, didn't think he'd go far As luck would have it, he was hit by a car thought we'd spend the day, saying goodbye Would you believe, he didn't die At the vet, running up my credit I'll revise my budget again and re edit Sporting a cone around his head The doctor said he should be hand fed It's ok, I have time to spare Out of work due to an allergy flare Looking like a blowfish with chicken pox Hamster got loose at the delight of a fox Kids called the cops for animal abuse Handcuffed for 2 hours before they let me loose Neighborhood kids, come knocking I wish I could say it was the least bit shocking Leaving doors open, letting in the flies I hide in the bathroom and find I have spies Little feet under the shower curtain Bottoms spanked, hands hurtin Crawl in the bed at 1 a.m. Sleep for 5 hours, then do it again