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First Born Son

Doubts fill my head like a floating stream
I am pushing forward, but quickly running out of steam
Why am I doing what I’m doing? What even is the point?
As weariness pours over me, every bone and every joint 

I’m not the best at anything, even if I try
But I keep trying to be the best without a reason why
Every day I strive, searching for a new result
But nothing changes, I’m still the same 
Consistency’s insult
Insanity is the definition of my situation
Going forward through this life without an inspiration
Happiness and feelings gone, I am a robot now
As I continue to push on, wiping sweat from off my brow
Everyone holds me to high standards and prod me on along
Holding me on a short lease, control over-powering and strong 

But did you even care to ask me how this makes me feel?
You manipulate and use me; my pride is what you steal
I am not your prize for you to parade
I am not a pawn in your own little charade 
I can run my own life and do not need your help
Your constant expectations wearing thin upon myself
I don’t need to jump through hoops in order to impress
My future now may be a haze, but you don’t need obsess 
I know how to live my life without your consent
I know how to carry myself and don’t care if it makes you upset

Now let go of the reigns and give me back the wheel
I can handle my own life and I know how to feel
I may not be the man or son you wanted me to be
But you have to let go of control; you must let me be free
You cannot change my spirit or my personality
You cannot change my pessimistic mentality

I will only say this once and try to say it nice:

Let me be who I am and let me live my life.

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