Final Goodbye

this is my final goodbye but i aint gonna cry its my final goodbye but i aint gonna cry 99 problems i should be renamed hova i use tot think about u but u never came closer you or mom couldnt remain soba i write this cuz i need the pain over i was always the first to blame myself for all the hurt and pain i felt few times wanted to kurt kobain myself but all these words came to help i guess im a bad guy 25th feb 07 my dad died i find it hard to shed tears i put pen to paper and make my pad cry i often wonder if you were there for me would things of been diffrent would we of laughed and shared storys or would i be a kid whos father aint missin we cant always have what we want and need all i wanted was my dad is that so bad am i allowed to admit im sad does that give u to much ammo because i rap people expect me to be rambo i was on da edge of a cliff and you let my hand go i remeber you and mom fightin hopin it would stop i was in the corner cryin thinkin how much does a hug cost age 3 i got took into care got to see u 6 times a year on contact u would turn up blind from beer look in my eyes u wont find a tear i dont wanna sound like im dissin you ur my dad i cant rin from missin you but u and mom brought so much hurt to me and your death was the rebirth of me 2 months after you passed my best friend commited suicide a yaer later my gf miscqarried my child sumhow i still manage to carry a smile