Feminist In the Garden
(Inspired by all the Adams, but with special mention to Frank,
Dr. Ram, and Christopher)
For being a lazy head, see what you reap. . .
I came from your ribcage while you were asleep!
I’m second but best, and I’m looking fly,
so get with the program. Wise up, silly guy!
Don’t get all riled now that I’m not your type.
Have you seen a mirror? Talk about hype!
Go look in the stream then and see what I mean.
I’m needing a king because I am the queen!
You can’t lay down laws, for Eve is my name.
And as the First Lady, rule-breaking’s my game!
And neither to me does size matter a bit.
I’m after a man who has style and great wit!
Around here you won’t find a 7-11.
What did you think? That we’d gone to heaven?
Inside this here garden, with plenty to eat,
I’ll cook, but you catch it. . . And bring me a treat!
If being away from my voice is your wish,
then go to that stream there and catch me a fish.
I’ve already trained all the parrots to talk
to entertain me while you’re out on a walk!
Go be by yourself whenever you please.
I’m woman, and I’ve put the creatures at ease.
The mammals already have found me so grand,
I’ve got them all eating right out of my hand.
Because of my wisdom and my patient ways
I think we’ll be living here millions of days.
So don’t bother me and I won’t bother you.
And maybe we’ll even find “fun stuff” to do!
A doctor named Ram in a garden nearby
is looking for someone who digs a smart guy.
He says that he needs the “intellect’s touch”
I might just go there if you hassle me much!
And off somewhere else I heard of another
named Adam too. Could he be your brother?
I might like to check him out, though his Eve
has told me he fancies himself with a Steve!
And don’t think I’ll leave for your telling me to.
There’s only so much you can get me to do.
That snake tried to give me an apple. The fool.
I rarely eat fruit, but a roast sure sounds cool!
So gird up your loins and catch us a lion.
Then I’ll don my leaf apron and begin fryin’.
And just you remember, in sex’s sweet war,
The one with nice “melons” is surest to score!
For Deborah Guzzi's Eve in Eden Contest
& for P.D.Slam contest (thanks Deb and P.D!)
Copyright © Andrea Dietrich | Year Posted 2010
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