Feeling Emotions - Am I Abnormal
I’ve found something about myself
As people do as their lives’ pass
But I’m scared of what I’ve discovered
I’m scared that I don’t feel emotions as they do
But only sometimes
Sometimes I feel them just fine
Other times I feel too much or too little
I can watch sad movies and bawl like an infant
I don’t like sad movies
I feel too much
I can get so happy
Feel so much joy and excitement
I don’t know what to do with it all
On the opposite side of the scale
I can not care at all
I feel nothing
Nothing but annoyance and irritation
Nothing less than hate
I don’t want to feel like this
I don’t want to hide this
I want to care
I want to be the shoulder they can cry on when they tell me their
But I can’t
I feel as though they are bothersome
I feel like I couldn’t care less
I wish they would just shut up!
Is there something wrong with me?
Am I abnormal?
Does this make me less human?
I have yet to find any answers
I don’t think I want the answers anymore
So afraid to hear the ‘yes’ from their lips
As I do in my head
I don’t like feeling like this
I don’t want to be like this
But does that really change anything?
Does wanting to be different change the fact that I am who I am?
That I am abnormal?
That I am less than human?
I want thee answers
But God, I pray I don’t get them
Copyright © Raven Jones | Year Posted 2021
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