Fault

I’m not myself I’ve changed myself I hate myself But it is my fault He was married He said he’d leave He too made her believe But after a few years Now would be three I am still waiting for the promise I was told that year. It’s too hard he says The ex won’t let you and the kids near. What a load of **** I’m expected to believe this? But I’m in love with him So I don’t call it quits. He stays the nights when he can Trying to get them to understand He’s still their dad He’s still ‘their’ man Though when he’s there, There’s still something that I can not understand Why can’t I call? Why don’t you reply? If they know you’re in a relationship with I? In the past you have lied Made me crumble Made me cry What’s different this time? You still haven’t tried. You stay in her home Its the only way She will let you visit your kids those days? I’m asked not to get involved Yet my jealousy desperately needs to be resolved Will you one day leave me out in the cold? ‘Coz I’ve been doing what you’ve always told. “Don’t post anything for her to see, It will just fuel the fire for her and her family” So I listen to this advice and always think twice Before posting anything that may compromise. My family can’t understand why I’m still with this man, I don’t expect them to comprehend. Because one day I know, His true intentions may show But for now through all the confusion I have made my final conclusion I’m still not myself I still change myself But I can not hate myself Because it is not my fault!