Father

How come you say you love me but ignore me? How come you see me but dont hear me? How come you let her abuse me but supposedly don't see it? What made you think it was ok? What made you send me away? Was it her that tainted your mind, Or was it you telling yourself it was fine? I realize now that you never truly loved me or you would have saved me. I realize now that you have let her control you. I love you but I can not put up with it anymore. If she is truly the person you love then so be it, I couldn't stand it anymore so I walked out the door. You say you love me but let me leave. I was your daughter and I love you, But you are not a good father… What was going through your mind that morning? I sat there and silently broke while you lashed out I sat there silently trying to think of what i did wrong I sat there thinking of who would miss me if i was gone I was contemplating death and you didn't notice, Or maybe you did but just didn't care. You finally made me snap. Afterwards you acted like nothing happened, We went and got my driving permit and i went to work after. I broke down when I got there, I called my mom and you had not told her the whole truth. I put you in jail that night, I feel bad but you deserved it. We have court coming up soon, How are you going to react when I walk into the room, looking more alive than I have in the last 10 years What are you going to say when I tell the judge everything? Will you deny it and say I'm being dramatic like always? Will you say that you are guilty and see your mistakes, What am I even saying? Of course you won't, You told me that morning that everything was my fault, I started to believe it but then I saw the truth. What will you do when you are told that you are never allowed to see me again? Will you cry? Will you be ecstatic youre getting rid of me, Or will you be mad because I am finally happy and where I belong? I say I love you, Its true and even with all the pain you put me through, I still do. I will always have the good memories, but also the bad, You will always be in my heart. You will always be my father, Just not a very good one.