Fall

I cut myself to know what blood looks like again
I realize that with just one more blow, I'd end the pain
 
But still I cling to life
Just like it were the only truth
Still I will not die
Completing what I knew
 
Regardless, life will not allow my mind to stay the same
I left my only love to see what loneliness felt like again
 
And still I held to hope
Now I let go, I know the pain in me
I'm still in life's downslope
I won't grab hold again
 
When I woke from a dream, I found that I'd been living one true lie
And so I killed the scream building up inside of me with a knife
 
And finally I found reality in me
And finally I found I never wanted to be more
Than a door, with a window to the world inside of me
Like a whore, sold my soul just to end the pain, to kill reality
 
And now I end my life
Adverse to anything apart from me
So now I hold this knife
Closest to my heart:
Inside of me.

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