Jen H. Poet Free verse

Fading Away

I open my eyes
Everything spinning
Bouncing softly with each step someone takes
My head throbbing
Wet hot tears on my face
Sweat running into my eyes
Strapped into the car
Blackness...

Beep, beep, beep
My eyes flutter open
Bright lights protrude my vision
Every thing seems to be swaying
My heart seems to be in my head
I think back
Really hard
What happened
Where am I
Nothing...

The muffled voices of my parents
Arguing as usual
Footstep getting louder and louder 
Until I think my head will explode
Then silence
I hear, just snips of the conversation outside
Doctor...concussion...stay...amnesia...brain damage...
Then things fade again...

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Sara Kendrick August 9, 2009 at 10:29 AM I could take several interpertations from this one and don't know exactly what you wanted to convey. One thing is that I am sure this person is facing death. Very descriptive and emotional writing. Keep writing. Sara

Carolyn Devonshire August 8, 2009 at 5:00 PM This must surely be what it is like in our final moments. Your poem made me wonder once more how aware my father may or may not have been when the doctor's read his living will and told us to pull the plug. Captivating, intriguing read! Love, Carolyn

Ned Flanders August 8, 2009 at 1:05 PM Ooh, quite a vivid picture painted here and no happy ending.. Enjoyed, cheers.

Edward Orozco August 8, 2009 at 12:36 PM This is a great piece! Good work and well felt suspense!- eddie