Fading Away

I open my eyes
Everything spinning
Bouncing softly with each step someone takes
My head throbbing
Wet hot tears on my face
Sweat running into my eyes
Strapped into the car
Blackness...

Beep, beep, beep
My eyes flutter open
Bright lights protrude my vision
Every thing seems to be swaying
My heart seems to be in my head
I think back
Really hard
What happened
Where am I
Nothing...

The muffled voices of my parents
Arguing as usual
Footstep getting louder and louder 
Until I think my head will explode
Then silence
I hear, just snips of the conversation outside
Doctor...concussion...stay...amnesia...brain damage...
Then things fade again...

Copyright © | Year Posted 2009



Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 8/9/2009 10:29:00 AM
I could take several interpertations from this one and don't know exactly what you wanted to convey. One thing is that I am sure this person is facing death. Very descriptive and emotional writing. Keep writing. Sara
Login to Reply
Date: 8/8/2009 5:00:00 PM
This must surely be what it is like in our final moments. Your poem made me wonder once more how aware my father may or may not have been when the doctor's read his living will and told us to pull the plug. Captivating, intriguing read! Love, Carolyn
Login to Reply
Date: 8/8/2009 1:05:00 PM
Ooh, quite a vivid picture painted here and no happy ending.. Enjoyed, cheers.
Login to Reply
Date: 8/8/2009 12:36:00 PM
This is a great piece! Good work and well felt suspense!- eddie
Login to Reply
Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter
Hide Ad