Beautiful Scars Poet Rhyme

Faded Thoughts

Thoughts how they fade from white to gray,
and the memories we made, 
                                turned to dust just today.
Ashes we smoked and the dreams we dreamt,
all DIED in your arms and I wept...
                                               -and wept.
                                                                                                 
Please forgive me- believe me when I say I am sorry-
I feel sad for you but not as sad as I feel for me.
Self pity is a disease,
              but it puts me at ease,
                         and I just wish these flea's, 
would get off my bleeding back.
If I could paint you a river, I'd swim to your shore,
mend all I tore... 
                      ...now it's you that I lack.

It has always been you...
                            ALWAYS been you...
you were my envelope, you were my flu,
you cut me apart because you made me whole,
I'm sorry I stole...your heart...
                                         -your heart...   




NA in CONTEST NO 204 any form-theme max of 16 lines 
Judged September 17, 2016

For contest: Screwed XVI 
                                          
Date Written: September 26, 2015

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James Inman March 9, 2017 at 7:08 AM Relationships are difficult. Nice write.

Mark Martin March 8, 2017 at 4:22 PM Congratulations on your win Laura! :-)

Eve Roper March 8, 2017 at 1:52 PM Well done and profound congratulations on you win ~*

Constance La France March 8, 2017 at 8:25 AM Laura, this poem is so beautifully penned, I love the words, the pattern, the image, I love everything about it. Congratulations on your placement in Rob's contest~

Andrea Dietrich January 28, 2016 at 3:35 PM Oh, Laura, I had NOT seen it after all, and I see why you are so fond of this one. It's so sad, and the way you wrote it, we really feel you emoting. I enjoyed the rhyme in it, not always at the end lines either. Wonderful writing! Beautiful Scars January 28, 2016 at 4:27 PM Thank you lovely lady Andrea :) Have a blessed day :)

Viv Wigley November 4, 2015 at 12:12 AM A very moving piece, Laura, but tempered with the soothing balm that all ended happily, eventually. Congrats! Viv Beautiful Scars November 4, 2015 at 1:22 PM Thank you Viv!! :) -LU

Robert Lindley November 3, 2015 at 5:48 PM A very fine poem my friend, congrats on your win! Beautiful Scars November 3, 2015 at 8:20 PM Thank you Robert :) Be blessed -LU

Eve Roper November 3, 2015 at 1:57 PM Wow! Beautiful, Laura, congratulations on your win! Hugs Eve Beautiful Scars November 3, 2015 at 3:30 PM Thank you Eve! :)

Skat A November 3, 2015 at 1:05 PM Laura, Congratulations on your Any Sad Poem win. LOVE **SKAT**

Dr. Upma A. Sharma November 3, 2015 at 2:07 AM Yet another wonderful poem n win Laura.. big congrats! Beautiful Scars November 3, 2015 at 1:01 PM Thank you so much :)

Balveen Cheema October 6, 2015 at 11:07 AM A rhytmical flow in your poetry , Laura! Beautiful Scars October 18, 2015 at 6:02 PM Thank you very much :)

Skat A September 27, 2015 at 5:51 PM Laura, the flow is wonderful and deep. Thoughts how they fade, from white to gray, And the memories we made, turned to dust just today. I chose this line because the imagery and language suggest behind every fading moment is guilt. A disease of self-pity. I like your use of repetition (wept and wept) it gives off a very serious and frantic mood when reading the poem. By the way, this has been the best poem I read today. 9-27-15. SKAT Beautiful Scars September 27, 2015 at 5:59 PM Thank you SKAT A. Your words make me feel so good because I'm so new at this. I've never shown my poems to anyone but my fam. It was a little scary at first, but I'm getting better at not being so self-conscience. Thank you :) Skat A September 27, 2015 at 5:51 PM A Favorite by the way

Mark Woods September 26, 2015 at 8:48 PM Laura go to the contest page go to the contest and press the enter contest button then scroll down and select your poem. Drop us a line if you struggle. All the best Beautiful Scars September 26, 2015 at 9:14 PM Great Thank You so much!!! have a great night!!