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poor Walter Jacobs, a wretched soul was he
one day he said he had enough, then hung himself from a tree!

the tree was old and brittle, its branches gloomy and dead,
which snapped like a fragile twig, as Walter fell on top of his head! 

from the tallest building in town, he decided to make a jump,
he landed on a construction scaffold, which made a loud..."KA-THUMP!!"

he grabbed an old revolver, one that he swiped from his mother,
the bullet passed through his empty skull, one ear and out the other!

he laid across some railroad tracks, silent as an unspeakable mime,
wouldn't you know that train had stopped, just in the nick of time!

a bottle of sleeping pills didn't do the trick!
he barfed like a volcano, they only made him sick!

he drove his car off a bridge, such a stupid plan he hatched,
he walked away unscathed, without a single scratch!

he set himself on fire, but the flames quickly died
all he lost were the hairs on his butt, which badly singed his pride!

one day Walter said to himself,..."life ain't so bad, what the heck!"
just then he tripped over his sleeping cat, and broke his freakin' neck!

a moral behind this writing? i knew you'd quickly ask!
no one said life was easy, each day's a difficult task!

death's beyond the horizon, time passes all too fast,
life's with us for only a moment, slow down and make it last!...

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