Duplex

red of wrath


dusk jams
  the light,
     her teeth
        gnashing
           from wrath
              pierced by
                deceit...
                      rage bangs
                            on walls;
                                 cut-glass
                                  slitting                         
                         inside
             vile mouth
                lashed with
                      falsehood—

    his lies
       about
           lust’s tryst
     masked, hushed...
        she pants,
            tongue’s fire
                explodes
      just like
       boiled veins
          curdling
              until,
                   raw flash
             growls on,
                                 
           “YOU SCUM—
         wolf  for
                   harlots!"
      torn  wife
  bleeds red.

         ~   
      Duplex Contest
        For Jan Allison
          11.08.2016

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Darren White

Date: 12/10/2016 11:56:00 PM

Wow Nette, symbolic or true, the ferocity jumps at you... Congratulations!

Alexis Y.

Date: 12/10/2016 8:06:00 PM

Hi Nette, I'm just coming back to say congratulations on your 1st place win. It was well deserved: -) Alexis

Agnes Krampe

Date: 12/10/2016 7:54:00 PM

Coming back with congrats!

Jan Allison

Date: 12/10/2016 6:30:00 PM

I love the way you formatted this very descriptive poem Nette :-) I am delighted people took time to have a go at the contest and it filled so quickly:-) Many congrats on your top spot:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 12/8/2016 6:21:00 PM

I'm not sure it was really murder, was it, Nette? I am wondering if all the red blood images, etc were symbolic only. Anyway, it was VERY descriptive. Most descriptive I think I have read for this contest.

Janis Medders Tobechi

Date: 12/7/2016 9:48:00 PM

I see clearly what is going on in this relationship. Great write, nette. Should be a winner I predict.

Space Cadet

Date: 12/7/2016 9:37:00 PM

Wow. Bruising, cold, and venomous image(s) with just enough words to emote your message. Great work. Thank you for sharing. -- Wesley C.

Daniel Turner

Date: 12/7/2016 5:15:00 PM

Quite vitriolic, nette. Banging on walls,cutting glass, vile mouth, I shutter to think.

Doug Vinson

Date: 12/7/2016 3:29:00 PM

Whew...Wow... "boiled veins curdling" and "cut glass slitting" - these are choice cuts of language. Hot with rage and sad violence, great poetry.

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 12/7/2016 2:06:00 PM

- .... powerful and great written, Nette - Good luck in the contest - hugs // Anne-Lise :)

Heidi Sands

Date: 12/7/2016 1:48:00 PM

Nette, that really shows it . Good luck in the contest!

Agnes Krampe

Date: 12/7/2016 1:31:00 PM

Nice one, Nette! the two syllable form gives it a breathless quality, the anger gets through really well. Good luck in the contest.

Alexis Y.

Date: 12/7/2016 1:03:00 PM

WoW! Nette, this is good. I could feel the angst, hurt and deceit. Well done. I wish you the best of luck in the contest. A without a doubt seven:-) Alexis

Tim Smith

Date: 12/7/2016 12:37:00 PM

Great nette...I like how each line has its own emphasis.

Chris Green

Date: 12/7/2016 12:35:00 PM

Wow Nette, this was so good. The anger was felt and the betrayal hurt. Nicely done and good luck in the contest.